Jan. 24, 2010
COLUMBUS: The election in Massachusetts was won by Scott Brown. The pundits are still debating whether he got elected because of his views on health care reform, or because he drives a truck.
Political candidates are not taking any chances. All across the country they are out searching for just the right pickup truck to drive during the campaign. Of course, it has to be an American truck, and the older the better. Prices have doubled in a week.. Farmers have seen a steep drop in the value of corn in the bin, but the old pickup in the shed can make up for it. Even if it’s a newer model, most farm trucks are so beat up they look to be at least thirty years old.
Personally, if in a moment of insanity I ever feel the urge to run for office, I’ll go to Tulsa and borrow my friend Gene’s 1921 Model T Ford Huckster pickup. Why, just the thought of running against such a formidable foe would so dishearten any other possible candidates that I would be a shoo in.
Speaking of farmers, I spent the past two weeks at agriculture conventions and meetings in Florida, Iowa and Ohio, and this week I’ll be in Minnesota and back to Ohio. If you’re not in agriculture I tell you that you can feel proud of these farm families who are learning the latest techniques and practices to grow food more efficiently. They are striving to make our streams cleaner, improve our soils, and save fuel and labor.
When President Obama gives his first State of the Union speech, if he’s looking for a bright spot or two in the economy he would be wise to point out what our farmers are doing. For example, they set new records for growing corn and soybeans. Dairy farmers are producing more milk with fewer cows. Here anyone is free to buy the kind of food they want, whether it’s organic, vegetarian, local, or hauled across the country. And from our abundance, we’ll donate generously to hungry people in Haiti and other countries.
We are down to two football teams left. The New Orleans Saints and Drew Brees slipped by Minnesota and Brett Favre in overtime 31-28. And the Indianapolis Colts and Peyton Manning came back to beat the Jets 30-17. The Saints and Colts seem to be evenly matched, and if I were betting I would put my money on the team with the most players that drive a truck.
Historic quotes from Will Rogers:
"Us Democrats just seem to have an uncanny premonition of sizing up a question and guessing wrong on it. It almost makes you think sometimes it is done purposely." Saturday Evening Post, Jan. 19, 1929
"Republicans like to drive a little cheap make of car around... They just love to play poor." Saturday Evening Post, March 30, 1929
"Last year we said: ‘Things can’t go on like this!’ And they didn’t – they got worse." (Notes, undated)
"Our President delivered his first (State of the Union) message to Congress. You know that's one of the things that his contract calls for, to deliver a message to Congress to tell them the Condition of the Country. This message, as I say, is to Congress; the rest of the country know the condition of the country, for they live in it. But the Senators and Congressmen have no idea what is going on in America. So the President has to tell 'em." WA #371, Feb. 2, 1930
Randall Reeder
Will Rogers Today http://willrogerstoday.com
614-477-0439 willrogers@aol.com
Need a Speaker? Hurry up and hire me before I die... again.
Showing posts with label Farmers. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Farmers. Show all posts
Monday, January 25, 2010
Monday, October 12, 2009
Weekly Comments: Peace talks are fine but keep your gun loaded #570
Sept. 27, 2009
COLUMBUS: This was quite a week for peace. At the United Nations, President Obama called to order the Security Council and they unanimously passed a motion to work toward a world without nuclear weapons. As soon as the vote was announced they all cheered, and every leader there slipped out and called home with the same message: Build more Nukes.
Next up was the speeches. Qaddafi of Libya and Chavez of Venezuela and the little fellow from Iran that we can’t pronounce all got their turn on stage. They took turns bashing America and the rest of the civilized world, and seeing who could tell the biggest lies. Where is Joe Wilson when you really need him?
Our President is back in Washington, working on changes in health care. He already promised to cut prices by eliminating waste and fraud. But he never defined exactly what fraud he would go after. Well, in a recent interview he gave a hint. After ACORN was embarrassed by videos where they promoted illegal activities, he was asked about the $50 million the government had paid to ACORN. He said that’s nothing to be concerned about because we have bigger problems to solve. So right there, he pretty much set the bar on fraud. If you want to cheat the government out of health care funds, keep it under $50 million and you’ll be home free.
Food prices are back in the news. Farmers are getting paid less than a year or two ago, but grocery stores and restaurants are charging more. Not much different than in 1925: “Steak on the plate went up, steak on the hoof went down.” Now, the Dept of Agriculture has a solution for you; get to know a farmer and buy direct. Not only do you cut out the middle man, you get acquainted with the folks that work to grow your food.
Speaking of farmers, one thing they are all praying for is a late frost. All across the country many crops got planted a week or two later than normal. They’re growing fine, but a delay in freezing weather would be greatly appreciated. Norman Borlaug, the great agricultural scientist who died recently, developed genetically-modified crops that helped keep a billion people from starvation. But I doubt he came up any that would keep growing after a hard freeze.
I just returned from Norfolk where I spoke at the Performing Arts Exchange. It’s mainly musical groups, singers, and dancers in kind of a gigantic tryout to get booked for live shows across the country. My angle to get hired was to promise not to sing, dance or play an instrument. Being over there so close to Washington, I told them for my act I just watch the government and report the facts. Don’t even have to exaggerate. There’s no trick to being a humorist when you have the whole government working for you.
Historic quotes from Will Rogers:
“It's all right to go to these (Disarmament) Conferences. But it's always well to come home and reload your gun after each one is over.” WA #416, Dec. 14, 1930
Randall Reeder is Will Rogers Today
http://willrogerstoday.com willrogers@aol.com
614-477-0439
Need a Speaker? Hurry up and hire me before I die... again.
COLUMBUS: This was quite a week for peace. At the United Nations, President Obama called to order the Security Council and they unanimously passed a motion to work toward a world without nuclear weapons. As soon as the vote was announced they all cheered, and every leader there slipped out and called home with the same message: Build more Nukes.
Next up was the speeches. Qaddafi of Libya and Chavez of Venezuela and the little fellow from Iran that we can’t pronounce all got their turn on stage. They took turns bashing America and the rest of the civilized world, and seeing who could tell the biggest lies. Where is Joe Wilson when you really need him?
Our President is back in Washington, working on changes in health care. He already promised to cut prices by eliminating waste and fraud. But he never defined exactly what fraud he would go after. Well, in a recent interview he gave a hint. After ACORN was embarrassed by videos where they promoted illegal activities, he was asked about the $50 million the government had paid to ACORN. He said that’s nothing to be concerned about because we have bigger problems to solve. So right there, he pretty much set the bar on fraud. If you want to cheat the government out of health care funds, keep it under $50 million and you’ll be home free.
Food prices are back in the news. Farmers are getting paid less than a year or two ago, but grocery stores and restaurants are charging more. Not much different than in 1925: “Steak on the plate went up, steak on the hoof went down.” Now, the Dept of Agriculture has a solution for you; get to know a farmer and buy direct. Not only do you cut out the middle man, you get acquainted with the folks that work to grow your food.
Speaking of farmers, one thing they are all praying for is a late frost. All across the country many crops got planted a week or two later than normal. They’re growing fine, but a delay in freezing weather would be greatly appreciated. Norman Borlaug, the great agricultural scientist who died recently, developed genetically-modified crops that helped keep a billion people from starvation. But I doubt he came up any that would keep growing after a hard freeze.
I just returned from Norfolk where I spoke at the Performing Arts Exchange. It’s mainly musical groups, singers, and dancers in kind of a gigantic tryout to get booked for live shows across the country. My angle to get hired was to promise not to sing, dance or play an instrument. Being over there so close to Washington, I told them for my act I just watch the government and report the facts. Don’t even have to exaggerate. There’s no trick to being a humorist when you have the whole government working for you.
Historic quotes from Will Rogers:
“It's all right to go to these (Disarmament) Conferences. But it's always well to come home and reload your gun after each one is over.” WA #416, Dec. 14, 1930
Randall Reeder is Will Rogers Today
http://willrogerstoday.com willrogers@aol.com
614-477-0439
Need a Speaker? Hurry up and hire me before I die... again.
Wednesday, June 24, 2009
Weekly Comments: PETA flies in the face of common sense
June 20, 2009
COLUMBUS: Over in Iran we have thousands of democratic-minded people taking to the streets to battle the government over actions of Ahmadinejad.
Meanwhile in this country we have PETA rising up in indignation over the actions of President Obama. This PETA organization, with the full backing of the (fake) Humane Society (HSUS), has decided that the Iran uprising, North Korea nuclear blasts and Trillion dollar deficits don’t matter as much as the life of one pesky house fly.
Instead of swatting these endangered critters, PETA wants the President and the rest of us to carefully trap annoying house flies, mosquitos, fleas and gnats, then provide them nourishment and comfortable quarters until enough have been rounded up to justify a drive to the country. Then, when a suitable farm habitat has been spotted, said critters will be released and shooed in the general direction of the nearest livestock, farmhands or vacationing dude ranchers.
If you have previously contributed to PETA and HSUS, and find that your views on the care and feeding of house flies and mosquitos are opposite to these organizations, I suggest you ask for return of your money. Maybe half of what you get back you can donate to those Iranians endangering their own lives to fight for democracy.
Meanwhile California has shut off the irrigation water to farmers who grow a big chunk of our food. And the reason given is nearly as foolish as the house fly killing controversy: they are saving all the water for a little minnow. Now I’ve got nothing against this particular minnow; mixed in a salad, they could be mighty tasty. But I rather doubt that even with the most prolific animal husbandry, you could produce enough of these minnows to replace the nourishment being lost from those dried up farms.
I’m headed to Reno tomorrow for a convention of engineers. Reno’s next door to California, but they continue to provide water to anyone who needs it. Reno was once known as the divorce capital of the country but other states horned in and that business dried up. Today they’re hoping to get back into it, starting with their own U.S. Senator.
Historic quotes from Will Rogers:
[Letter to President Coolidge, vacationing in Vermont] “Well, I guess by the time this reaches you, you will have brushed all the Chiggers and Fleas and Mosquitoes off of you, and are back in the White House with nothing to worry you but Farmers and Democrats. If it had been me, I believe I would have stayed up there all year.” Saturday Evening Post, August 1926
“They no more than stop Cal [Coolidge] from fishing with worms than he goes out with flies and catches even more. If they stop his using flies, why, he is getting so Western that he is just liable to pull out his .44 and shoot a flock of fish, or take down his old lariat and [rope] enough for dinner. There's no stopping the man. He is a modern [Teddy] Roosevelt.” DT #303, July 12, 1927
“People don’t change under governments. Governments change, but the people remain the same.” Saturday Evening Post, Dec. 4, 1926
Randall Reeder is Will Rogers Today
http://willrogerstoday.com willrogers@aol.com
614-477-0439
Need a Speaker? Hurry up and hire me before I die... again.
COLUMBUS: Over in Iran we have thousands of democratic-minded people taking to the streets to battle the government over actions of Ahmadinejad.
Meanwhile in this country we have PETA rising up in indignation over the actions of President Obama. This PETA organization, with the full backing of the (fake) Humane Society (HSUS), has decided that the Iran uprising, North Korea nuclear blasts and Trillion dollar deficits don’t matter as much as the life of one pesky house fly.
Instead of swatting these endangered critters, PETA wants the President and the rest of us to carefully trap annoying house flies, mosquitos, fleas and gnats, then provide them nourishment and comfortable quarters until enough have been rounded up to justify a drive to the country. Then, when a suitable farm habitat has been spotted, said critters will be released and shooed in the general direction of the nearest livestock, farmhands or vacationing dude ranchers.
If you have previously contributed to PETA and HSUS, and find that your views on the care and feeding of house flies and mosquitos are opposite to these organizations, I suggest you ask for return of your money. Maybe half of what you get back you can donate to those Iranians endangering their own lives to fight for democracy.
Meanwhile California has shut off the irrigation water to farmers who grow a big chunk of our food. And the reason given is nearly as foolish as the house fly killing controversy: they are saving all the water for a little minnow. Now I’ve got nothing against this particular minnow; mixed in a salad, they could be mighty tasty. But I rather doubt that even with the most prolific animal husbandry, you could produce enough of these minnows to replace the nourishment being lost from those dried up farms.
I’m headed to Reno tomorrow for a convention of engineers. Reno’s next door to California, but they continue to provide water to anyone who needs it. Reno was once known as the divorce capital of the country but other states horned in and that business dried up. Today they’re hoping to get back into it, starting with their own U.S. Senator.
Historic quotes from Will Rogers:
[Letter to President Coolidge, vacationing in Vermont] “Well, I guess by the time this reaches you, you will have brushed all the Chiggers and Fleas and Mosquitoes off of you, and are back in the White House with nothing to worry you but Farmers and Democrats. If it had been me, I believe I would have stayed up there all year.” Saturday Evening Post, August 1926
“They no more than stop Cal [Coolidge] from fishing with worms than he goes out with flies and catches even more. If they stop his using flies, why, he is getting so Western that he is just liable to pull out his .44 and shoot a flock of fish, or take down his old lariat and [rope] enough for dinner. There's no stopping the man. He is a modern [Teddy] Roosevelt.” DT #303, July 12, 1927
“People don’t change under governments. Governments change, but the people remain the same.” Saturday Evening Post, Dec. 4, 1926
Randall Reeder is Will Rogers Today
http://willrogerstoday.com willrogers@aol.com
614-477-0439
Need a Speaker? Hurry up and hire me before I die... again.
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