Oct. 3, 2010
COLUMBUS: McDonald’s may be dropping health insurance for their employees and that’s got Democrats in Congress concerned. After November, that’s where some of these folks may be working.
As for McDonald’s, the folks who should be concerned about health insurance are the ones eating there. But really, I’m not going to take potshots at any hamburger joint. I’ve raised (and eaten) enough beef in my time to know it won’t hurt you. If you want to stick to eating only vegetables, that’s fine with me. But I’ll take my chances with ham or steak or chicken breast meat along with potatoes, soup beans and onions. And cherry pie. Now that’s good eatin’.
Granted, eating a half dozen Big Macs every day might not leave you feeling chipper. But neither would five pounds a day of broccoli.
Rahm Emanuel is returning to Chicago to run for mayor. Politics in Washington was too mild for him. In Chicago he can cuss out the gangsters and a few stray Republicans.
Washington is deserted. With less than a month till the election, Congress decided it was more important to go home and tell the voters how they intend to vote instead of actually voting. If you want to know where your candidate stands on income tax rates, inheritance taxes, or immigration, just ask. But you can only vote for the person, not how he will vote. In the Lame Duck session, he might do just the opposite. In that two week session after the election, Speaker Pelosi says they will vote on twice as many bills as they have in the previous two years.
In California, the race for governor heated up. Not over how to fix a Fifty Billion Dollar deficit, but rather Meg Whitman’s maid who was fired more than a year ago. It seems Jerry Brown just learned the maid was a Mexican working here illegally, and made an example of her. On TV, Whitman said, "She told us she was legal, we treated her like part of the family, and paid her $23 an hour." The next day two million Californians called Whitman’s campaign office. Not to volunteer, not to complain, but rather to apply for the maid’s old job.
The government announced a warning for anyone traveling to Europe. Al Qaeda is threatening to blow up Europe like they did New York. Well, your odds of being wiped out by a terrorist are probably lower than being killed by a teenager texting while driving. Threat or no threat, here’s what I suggested in 1930: There ought to be a law against anybody going to Europe till they had seen the things we have in this country.
Historic quotes from Will Rogers:
"I'll bet there is more fool things done for publicity's sake that defeat their own purpose than ever aided it." DT #1816, May 19, 1932
"Being serious or being a good fellow has got nothing to do with running this country. If the breaks are with you, you could be a laughing hyena and still have a great administration." DT #1315, Oct. 10, 1930
Randall Reeder
Will Rogers Today http://willrogerstoday.com
614-477-0439 willrogers@aol.com
Need a Speaker? Hurry up and hire me before I die... again.
Showing posts with label Washington D.C.. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Washington D.C.. Show all posts
Monday, October 25, 2010
Monday, March 15, 2010
Weekly Comments: Will reports from Washington: economy booming #594
March 14, 2010
COLUMBUS: If you want to see a city on the move, go to Washington. Buildings are being built and renovated. Cars and buses pack the streets. No foreclosure signs, and seldom a vacant store. When the President looks up Pennsylvania Avenue all he sees is a booming economy. No wonder he thinks his stimulus plan is working.
Can’t be much unemployment. Around the Capitol it’s just crawling with traffic cops and security folks. If you can blow a whistle and say, "No, you can’t go there," (in English), they’ll probably hire you. At the Department of Agriculture they checked visiting farmers to be sure they weren’t trying to sneak in a pitchfork or ax handle, even if they was wearing a 3-piece suit.
I didn’t get into the Capitol. They closed it on Wednesday for a big ceremony honoring civilian women pilots from World War II. I read in the newspaper that some of the men back then did not believe a woman could fly one of those Army airplanes. A plane would land, a woman would climb down out of it, and the guy on the ground would ask her, "Where’s the pilot?" Shucks, I could have told them about plenty of fine aviatrixes way before 1940, like Amelia Earhart. The women used to have air races, called them Power Puff Derbies.
An Ohio farmer got excited when he came across an old newspaper article where Nancy Pelosi said she wanted to "drain the swamp." See, there is millions of acres of farm land in Ohio and other states that floods about every spring and stays wet. The government has said it should be called a "wetland" and leave it alone. So he thought Speaker Pelosi had changed her mind and would let farmers put in more ditches and tile. But she was only talking about cleaning up Congress, mainly Republicans. She was surprised to find a few Democrats mired down in the mud, too.
Almost a hundred of us Ohio Farm Bureau members got to meet in the Longworth House Office Building (named for Nick Longworth, Speaker from 1926-31) with Mike Pence of Indiana and several Ohio Congressmen including Boehner, Tiberi, Jordan, Austria and Marcy Kaptur.
John Boehner is the loyal opposition to the Democrats and Speaker Pelosi. He does not think the Health Care bill will pass. "The minute the Democrats can round up a majority for it, she will hold a vote. She’s been trying since Christmas, and is still short." On the Estate Tax bill, Boehner says they will compromise and pass it. But Congressman Tiberi says he doesn’t think Congress can make it retroactive to January 1. "How can we tell a family that lost Grandpa in February, when the tax was zero, that we’ve changed our minds and now we want 45 percent?"
Social Security payments are now borrowed from China. They used to come from payments by younger American workers, but those are short this year and they’ll have to borrow $29 Billion. A fellow who has been working for forty years is going to be thrilled to learn that all his Social Security money has been squandered and now he has to depend on the generosity of China and India to loan us enough to cover him. Social Security was started in 1935 by Franklin Roosevelt, and since about 1970 it was run by Bernie Madoff.
Personally, I think the best security for old age is to be nice to your grandchildren.
Historic quotes from Will Rogers:
"Retroactive. I like to use that word. I just learned it. Retroactive. It means that you can go back and get something that you forgot to get at the time. In other words they can turn around and go back and run over you after missing you the first time." Radio, May 26, 1935
Randall Reeder
Will Rogers Today http://willrogerstoday.com
614-477-0439 willrogers@aol.com
Need a Speaker? Hurry up and hire me before I die... again.
COLUMBUS: If you want to see a city on the move, go to Washington. Buildings are being built and renovated. Cars and buses pack the streets. No foreclosure signs, and seldom a vacant store. When the President looks up Pennsylvania Avenue all he sees is a booming economy. No wonder he thinks his stimulus plan is working.
Can’t be much unemployment. Around the Capitol it’s just crawling with traffic cops and security folks. If you can blow a whistle and say, "No, you can’t go there," (in English), they’ll probably hire you. At the Department of Agriculture they checked visiting farmers to be sure they weren’t trying to sneak in a pitchfork or ax handle, even if they was wearing a 3-piece suit.
I didn’t get into the Capitol. They closed it on Wednesday for a big ceremony honoring civilian women pilots from World War II. I read in the newspaper that some of the men back then did not believe a woman could fly one of those Army airplanes. A plane would land, a woman would climb down out of it, and the guy on the ground would ask her, "Where’s the pilot?" Shucks, I could have told them about plenty of fine aviatrixes way before 1940, like Amelia Earhart. The women used to have air races, called them Power Puff Derbies.
An Ohio farmer got excited when he came across an old newspaper article where Nancy Pelosi said she wanted to "drain the swamp." See, there is millions of acres of farm land in Ohio and other states that floods about every spring and stays wet. The government has said it should be called a "wetland" and leave it alone. So he thought Speaker Pelosi had changed her mind and would let farmers put in more ditches and tile. But she was only talking about cleaning up Congress, mainly Republicans. She was surprised to find a few Democrats mired down in the mud, too.
Almost a hundred of us Ohio Farm Bureau members got to meet in the Longworth House Office Building (named for Nick Longworth, Speaker from 1926-31) with Mike Pence of Indiana and several Ohio Congressmen including Boehner, Tiberi, Jordan, Austria and Marcy Kaptur.
John Boehner is the loyal opposition to the Democrats and Speaker Pelosi. He does not think the Health Care bill will pass. "The minute the Democrats can round up a majority for it, she will hold a vote. She’s been trying since Christmas, and is still short." On the Estate Tax bill, Boehner says they will compromise and pass it. But Congressman Tiberi says he doesn’t think Congress can make it retroactive to January 1. "How can we tell a family that lost Grandpa in February, when the tax was zero, that we’ve changed our minds and now we want 45 percent?"
Social Security payments are now borrowed from China. They used to come from payments by younger American workers, but those are short this year and they’ll have to borrow $29 Billion. A fellow who has been working for forty years is going to be thrilled to learn that all his Social Security money has been squandered and now he has to depend on the generosity of China and India to loan us enough to cover him. Social Security was started in 1935 by Franklin Roosevelt, and since about 1970 it was run by Bernie Madoff.
Personally, I think the best security for old age is to be nice to your grandchildren.
Historic quotes from Will Rogers:
"Retroactive. I like to use that word. I just learned it. Retroactive. It means that you can go back and get something that you forgot to get at the time. In other words they can turn around and go back and run over you after missing you the first time." Radio, May 26, 1935
Randall Reeder
Will Rogers Today http://willrogerstoday.com
614-477-0439 willrogers@aol.com
Need a Speaker? Hurry up and hire me before I die... again.
Monday, February 15, 2010
Weekly Comments: Snow, basketball and birthdays cost a bundle #590
Feb. 14, 2010
COLUMBUS: An awful lot of Snow has rolled off your Shovels since I communed with you last week. I see where the Weather Bureau predicts more Snow. Good joke on the Weather Bureau. They can't have any more. They haven't got any place to put it.
Folks, that’s exactly how I started a column 87 years ago, Feb. 25, 1923. In Washington, DC, and plenty of other places, they will tell you it’s been about that long since they’ve seen so much snow. We have snow in 49 states; the only two places without snow are Hawaii and Vancouver.
Our federal government was shut down for most of the week. Only essential employees reported to work Now, I know what you’re thinking; if the President wants to cut the budget, there’s a hint on where to start. But instead of cutting, the President raised the debt ceiling to $14 Trillion. I think it was $10 Trillion a couple of years ago. Is that the way to solve our financial problem, make it so we can borrow more?
You would think the government shutdown in Washington would save us a pile of money. Instead it cost us taxpayers $100,000,000 a day. Makes you wonder what it costs when they are all show up.
In Vancouver the lack of snow is costing the city millions. While other cities are paying to truck snow out of town, Vancouver is paying to truck it in.
Speaking of losing money, the National Basketball Association says they will be $400,000,000 in the hole this year. Tonight they put on a game in Dallas and 108,000 showed up and paid to watch it. How could they lose money? Is the NBA run by the Post Office?
Remember when we used to have Lincoln’s Birthday on Feb. 12, and Washington’s on Feb. 22? The government split the difference and this year Feb. 15 is the only day we get to blow out the candles. At least it saves the government the cost of baking another cake.
Historic quotes from Will Rogers:
"Washington, D.C. papers say: ‘Congress is deadlocked and can’t act.’ I think that is the greatest blessing that could befall this country." WA #59, Jan.27, 1924
"There wasn't any Republicans in Washington’s day. No Republicans, no boll weevil, no income tax, no cover charge, no disarmament conferences, no luncheon clubs, no stop lights, no (radio), no head winds, no margins, no ticket speculators, no golf pants. My Lord, living in those times, who wouldn't be great?" DT #803, Feb. 21, 1929
"Lincoln is the one that said, ‘You can fool all the Democrats part of the time, and part of the Democrats all of the time. But a Republican is the only one you can fool all of the time.’ That's why he was a Republican." WA #320, Feb. 10, 1929
Randall Reeder is Will Rogers Today
http://willrogerstoday.com
614-477-0439 willrogers@aol.com
Need a Speaker? Hurry up and hire me before I die... again.
COLUMBUS: An awful lot of Snow has rolled off your Shovels since I communed with you last week. I see where the Weather Bureau predicts more Snow. Good joke on the Weather Bureau. They can't have any more. They haven't got any place to put it.
Folks, that’s exactly how I started a column 87 years ago, Feb. 25, 1923. In Washington, DC, and plenty of other places, they will tell you it’s been about that long since they’ve seen so much snow. We have snow in 49 states; the only two places without snow are Hawaii and Vancouver.
Our federal government was shut down for most of the week. Only essential employees reported to work Now, I know what you’re thinking; if the President wants to cut the budget, there’s a hint on where to start. But instead of cutting, the President raised the debt ceiling to $14 Trillion. I think it was $10 Trillion a couple of years ago. Is that the way to solve our financial problem, make it so we can borrow more?
You would think the government shutdown in Washington would save us a pile of money. Instead it cost us taxpayers $100,000,000 a day. Makes you wonder what it costs when they are all show up.
In Vancouver the lack of snow is costing the city millions. While other cities are paying to truck snow out of town, Vancouver is paying to truck it in.
Speaking of losing money, the National Basketball Association says they will be $400,000,000 in the hole this year. Tonight they put on a game in Dallas and 108,000 showed up and paid to watch it. How could they lose money? Is the NBA run by the Post Office?
Remember when we used to have Lincoln’s Birthday on Feb. 12, and Washington’s on Feb. 22? The government split the difference and this year Feb. 15 is the only day we get to blow out the candles. At least it saves the government the cost of baking another cake.
Historic quotes from Will Rogers:
"Washington, D.C. papers say: ‘Congress is deadlocked and can’t act.’ I think that is the greatest blessing that could befall this country." WA #59, Jan.27, 1924
"There wasn't any Republicans in Washington’s day. No Republicans, no boll weevil, no income tax, no cover charge, no disarmament conferences, no luncheon clubs, no stop lights, no (radio), no head winds, no margins, no ticket speculators, no golf pants. My Lord, living in those times, who wouldn't be great?" DT #803, Feb. 21, 1929
"Lincoln is the one that said, ‘You can fool all the Democrats part of the time, and part of the Democrats all of the time. But a Republican is the only one you can fool all of the time.’ That's why he was a Republican." WA #320, Feb. 10, 1929
Randall Reeder is Will Rogers Today
http://willrogerstoday.com
614-477-0439 willrogers@aol.com
Need a Speaker? Hurry up and hire me before I die... again.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)